Sunday, 12 August 2012
A beautiful Krishna Janmashtami
We celebrated Krishna Jayanthi on the evening of 9th August (Thursday) at home, since we follow the Tamil Iyer traditions and this year, our calendar showed that the Ashtami thithi fell on 9th August. I felt blessed as we finished the Puja and tuned in to the Radio Sai bhajan classroom for 'Jaya Krishna Kunja Vihari', a sweet bhajan that adores Sai as Lord Krishna. The vibes and happiness I felt on listening to the whole bhajan classroom were so good. I really felt the divine communion with my Lord.
We have the custom of drawing tiny footprints using rice flour in various rooms, indicating that Baby Krishna is running around here and there. When a friend asked me that night how the Puja went off at home and whether Krishna had come home, I told her about these footprints. She said, "That means the lil Krishna came home searching for your hearts."
I told her, "Lord Sai Krishna has already stolen my heart and run away. It's just that I'm not able to see His form, though I feel His presence." I had tears when I typed this sms to her. That night, I told Swami that He's my best friend -- my Prana Sakha. I told Him that I felt blessed that He had chosen me and thanked Him for everything and His constant presence in my life.
In Prasanthi Nilayam, Krishna Janmashtami celebrations were on Friday, Aug 10th. I watched the entire video proceedings from Sai Kulwant Hall in the morning and felt extremely happy, esp with the songs by the students and Swami's message in His discourse. He spoke highly of women and their devotion. He said that women are always very devoted to Lord and in fact, they are the ones who pull in the men to God. I felt very touched on hearing this. A great way to start off the day!
In the evening of Aug 10th, when I went to Sai Nivas (the Sai mandir near my house), I felt very happy to see Swami's photo and the other idols beautifully decked in garlands. The Krishna statue stood out magnificently, because He was decked from top to toe with many garlands and there was even a special focus light for Him. I was lost in His beauty!
On seeing the garlands, I immediately knew they had been freshly put that morning for the nagarsankeerthan. I also knew they would surely be changed before the evening bhajan.
I dunno why I suddenly got this thought. But I said, "Swami, I'm not a great lady like Droupadi. But one thing is I have firm faith in you like she did. On this Krishna Jayanthi day, I feel I should look up to you for protection like a sister would look to her brother. Droupadi considered you her brother and when she was in danger, when she was in any predicament or when she needed help, she called out to you only. Well, I too am doing the same thing. I have nobody else but you. You know what all is running thro my mind. You know my heart's desire. It is up to you to fulfil it."
One uncle in Sai Nivas who takes care of replacing the old garlands with new ones and other arrangements for the altar there sometimes gives me the garlands to take home as prasadam and we hang it with reverence at the entrance of our flat. That evening, as I was having the thought about how Krishna was Droupadi's brother, I suddenly got this thought also -- "Swami, it's been a long time since that uncle gave me garlands to take home. Today, the garlands are extra-special 'coz they are the garlands that you have worn this morning. If you make him give me those, I will take it that you're giving me a positive signal that you're soon going to bless me with what my heart desires."
The bhajan got over, I forgot about this and was getting ready to leave. That uncle had taken his cycle and was nearing the gate. But suddenly, he stopped and asked me "Would you like to take the garlands home?"
I immediately smiled and said, "Sure sir. If you give, I shall take them. Have I ever asked you for the garlands? Whenever you give them to me, I take it that Swami is giving and gladly take them home."
He said, "U surely deserve to take them home ma. Pls wait." Saying so, he rushed in and got me 4 garlands and gave saying "We used them this morning for Swami." What a finale to a beautiful Krishna Jayanthi! Swami keeps showing me every day that He is with me every second and knows every lil fleeting thought I have. :)
And it did not end there. When I went to Sai Nivas yesterday in the evening, he again gave me 2 garlands . :)
Another thing. There were some old Sanathana Sarathi books which I spotted in Sai Nivas. I usually look thro them 'coz some of the photos on the 1st page inside the cover are simply too good. I liked one photo and I brought that book home.
Just around 11 pm, I said "Swami, I am feeling sleepy but want to look thro this and see what is ur mesg for me." I just opened the cover. On the left-hand top corner of the inside of the cover, I saw this -- "Your discrimination is like a signal. Never ignore this signal. When your inner self tells you that something is right, you should follow it scrupulously, irrespective of what others say. Let people talk whatever they want, but we should remain steady in our mind."
I was simply stunned on reading these words. Just last evening, I had been chatting with a friend about 'signals' from Swami (or rather I perceived them as His responses to my prayers) and whether I was reading the signals correctly. And see the mesg He gives me!! Whoa!!
This msg further strengthened my resolve about something which has become like a raging fire within me. I pray to Bhagawan that He fulfills my only desire soon. I also pray to Him for firm faith, patience, persistence and strength to hold on until whatever I have resolved upon fructifies.
But I'm sure my Krishna will never let me down. :) He's very mischievous and keeps playing with me and makes me cry a lot but in the end, He will only pull me closer and closer to Him. Of that, I am sure!